It's about… I'm not entirely sure. You are told that Bellclap (who I gather must be some kind of servant of yours, or kinsman) is lost in one of the temples in the mountains with insufficient food. It's up to you to go and find him.

At least I think that's what it's about but Bellclap is written in such a confusing way that I could well be wrong. The narrative flow is decidedly uneasy as it seems to be written from the viewpoint of someone who relates your commands and their responses. If that sounds a little strange, this is the first location: "The temple consists of a stone room with an altar and a statue of you, sir. He entered it through an archway to the south." and this is what you get when you try to go south: "He is refusing, sir. Citing the dangers of the rain and lightning." I don't know about anyone else playing this game but I read that and wondered if the writer was a bit mad. This all makes for a remarkably strange gaming experience and, unfortunately, not one I found myself warming to at all. I suppose that the idea itself might not be a bad one in itself and with a better introduction - the one here, plain and simply, awful - it could even prove to be an interesting game, but throwing weirdness and confusion and outright bafflement at the player as soon as the game starts really isn't a good idea at all and is likely to lead to them quitting as soon as possible.

I didn't quit for at least… oh, another five minutes. That five minutes was spent struggling to make any kind of progress. I examined a statue which responded with "He stares defiantly at your likeness, starting with the feet and letting his eyes follow a path up past your chest, to your face and I must say I'm impressed. And so is Bellclap. That was the single most intense experience of his life. Well done, sir. I think he may be more docile now." Er… what? I examined a few items and their descriptions just left me wincing:

">x tunic
Woollen. Wet.

>x sandals
Leather.

>x coat
Large and fairly wet."

The bag, at least, gave me a proper description when I examined it but by that stage my enthusiasm for this game had sunk so desperately low that I doubt if it had turned around and suddenly become an utterly amazing game, I'd have still found myself wishing I'd never bothered starting to play it. Was it written for a joke or something? I'm damned if I know. It sure didn't succeed in making me laugh.

One final point: the walkthrough. The first command listed in the game is "cut finger". It baffles me why anybody would think to type that as there's no reason to cut your finger and nor do you even have anything to cut it with. Does the writer assume his players are psychic? In a way, I wish I was psychic. That way I could have avoided this sorry effort altogether and played a proper game instead.

1 out of 10