Dance Fever USA by Mel S




In the year 2018, an epidemic spread across the country, laying waste to everything in sight. It was called...



Dance Fever!



Deep within the bowels of the pentagon, lies a division so discrete, only three people know about it. G.A.D (Guys Against Dancing) was formed in 1996, designed to take down the Macarena. Luckily, the Macarena was destroyed before it caused World War 3, like it was designed to do.

But now, came an evil that made the Macarena look like the Pope. It was called "Dance Fever", a new song blasting across the airwaves that was subconciously telling the listeners to start World War 3, and shoot random people. The Government knew they needed help, so they turned to one organization: The Super Friends. But since Superman was in rehab for a numerous amount of reasons, the Government then turned to the second best dance related organization: G.A.D.

And that's where you come in. You're Agent Wasp, finally released from a jail stint due to the game "Wasp Connection". Luckily, you got out early because you promised to never make a sequel. G.A.D has hired you to stop the cause of Dance Fever, and since it counts to your community service, you accepted the mission.

The mission didn't seem too difficult. The song seems to be transmitting from a club in New York called "The Flaming Flamingo", one of the dumpiest clubs in the Country. But it's dumpiness is just a cover, because deep within the bowels of that club, is a machine that's pumping out Dance Fever, and you've got to destroy it.

Good luck Agent Wasp, and remember, you will shoot random people if you don't stop the fever.

> l
You're standing outside the Flaming Flamingo, voted worst club by every single magazine published, including ones that were written before the club was even built. A large neon sign hums above the entrance, a cord from the sign droops along the wall and extends into the Alley to the East. Guarding the entrance to the North, is a giant bouncer. A card on his coat says "Hi, my name is Bruno", and the word Bruno is spelled with capitals, with many skull and crossbone signs near it. Bruno is here.

> e
You move east.
Like most alley's, this one is dank and dark. Unlike most alleys, this one also has a huge machine generating power in it. The long cord from the neon club sign extends into the machine, which seems to be where the sign gets it's power. Along the walls of the alley, is a variety of graffiti, and lying on the floor of the alleyway, is a cat.

> x machine
It seems to be some kind of generator, generating power for the neon sign of the club. There's a huge red button that says "Electrical Energy Release" on the side of the machine, that has a bunch of warnings around it. It'd probably be dangerous to push.

> x graffiti
"Hey you. Pee on the ground. Trust me on this. Just pee."

> pee
Well, the wall told you to, so you do it. You pee on the ground.

Absolutely nothing happens, except now there's a huge puddle of pee on the ground.

> push red button
Going against any good judgement, you push hard on the red button. A huge bolt of electricity shoots down into the floor of the alley, and right into the fresh pee on the ground. Since you're standing in the pee, a huge bolt of electricity zaps into you, right into your head.

When you awaken, you're lying on the ground, your body smoldering. You stand up, and check your body for any major damage. As you began to check your head, you notice something odd. You're hair's now standing up from the huge shock, giving you an afro. Groovy.

> pet cat
You gently stroke the cat's fur, which causes his to start coughing. He lets out a loud "Oorrggaaaaaaaaaaa" and a wrench flies out of his mouth and into your hands. Wow, now that's a hairball.

> w
You move west.
You're standing outside the Flaming Flamingo, voted worst club by every single magazine published, including ones that were written before the club was even built. A large neon sign hums above the entrance, a cord from the sign droops along the wall and extends into the Alley to the East. Guarding the entrance to the North, is a giant bouncer. A card on his coat says "Hi, my name is Bruno", and the word Bruno is spelled with capitals, with many skull and crossbone signs near it. Bruno is here.

> n
Bruno notices your smoldering afro, and moves out of the way.

> l
Even with your low expectations, the club is hideously ugly. It consists of three things. A piece of carboard on the floor for dancing on, an 8 track which plays the music, and a door to the North which says "Workers Only: Everyone else will die". Now you can see why Hunter's Weekly gave this club such a bad review.

> dance
Since you're undercover in the club, you decide to act like a regular guest, and began dancing. Within seconds of your dancing, loud sirens go off and confetti begins to drop down from the ceiling. The door to the North opens up, and a man in a bright orange suit walks out.

"Congratulations sir, you're the 36th person to dance in this club! Here's your price, a tissue!"

The man hands you a tissue, and then walks back into the door he came in. You stand there, a look of horror and surprise on your face.

> n
It's locked. If only you had brought your magical key that you got from the wizard...Maybe you'll learn about the wizard and the key in a prequel!!!

No. No you won't. In fact, the key and the wizard aren't real. I made them up to impress you.

> use tissue on acid
You jab the tissue onto the battery acid, and soak some of it up.

> use acid on door
You spread the acid over the door, and a huge hole is burned into it. Now you can head North.

> n
You duck through the hole, and enter the next room.

> l
Wow, it's a huge secret room that has a giant computer in it. Luckily, there's no one in here, despite the fact that the man in the orange suit came out of this room. There's only one thing of interest for you in here: the computer. It stands in the center of the room, the words "Program Dance Fever: Run Forever" repeatedly prints across the screen.

> hit battery with wrench
"Hey chowderhead, I oughta punch you in the noggin!" The computer screams out, obviously in Three Stooges mode

The battery explodes as you hit it with the wrench, sending you flying out of the club in a flaming ball. If you weren't in extreme fiery pain, it would have been pretty funny.

You landed with a thud on a giant piece of jagged rock. Luckily, it only impaled you a little bit, so you were fine. You stood up, and looked across the horizon, at the flaming club.

Your magical necklack began to beep. You pushed the button on it, and the wizard's voice appeared.

"Wasp, it's me, Warlockian! Someone stole my magical dragon, and I need you to travel through time to save him!"

Agent Wasp looked up into the distance, his face covered in a vengeful expression.

"Don't worry Warlockian, Me and my ex-wife Mrs. Santa Clause will travel into space to stop him."





Agent Wasp woke up, his head on fire. He quickly stood up, and put his fiery head out. Well, the whole part of the wizard and space was a dream. Too bad, he really wanted to see Mrs. Clause again.

He was standing on the ashes of the Club, Bruno was standing next to him, trying to call the police with his shoe.

"Agent Wasp!" The voice screamed from your watchphone. "It's me, Chief of G.A.D. We just got word that the Macarena is making a comeback in Portugal, we need you down there now!"

Agent Wasp (AKA You) looked up, a hardened look of anger on your face.

"Book the next plane to Portugal, Chief. It looks like it's time I get macarena on some people's ass."



Coming soon: "Dance Fever Portugal: Can't Stop A-Dancin'"

Due to a problem involving the creators of the Macarena, Dance Fever Portugal will never be completed. Rest assured, if the game was done, it would've been released commericaly and would've generated trillions in profits.

Thank you, and good night.
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